Build a Good Foundation
for Life
Good personal and study habits are the foundation
for lifelong achievement. Now is the time to teach your child the
self-discipline and other skills that help children be more effective and feel
good about themselves, their learning and other areas of their lives. Here are
some ideas and resources that can help your child learn these important tools.
Self-Management:
Using personal discipline and responsibility to become a successful student
and good citizen.
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- Work on big goals first. Help your child to create positive, precise
and realistic goals. Write them down. Goals should be not too difficult
but not too easy.
- Break down the big goal into manageable
parts. Have your child
write down the smaller steps or mini-goals needed to reach the larger
goal. Set up deadlines and discuss your child's progress often.
- Create a plan to tackle the mini-goals. Explain the value of practice and training
in meeting goals. Work with your child to schedule time for study rather
than cramming for tests or assignment deadlines. Help your student form
a study group as well as set aside time for uninterrupted time for
homework.
Good organization sharpens your student's study
skills. Different colored file folders and assignments and notes filed in a
class-specific notebook are signs of organization.
- The Notebook. Notebooks make learning materials easy to
find. Folders and binders with dividers are great to organize notes,
assignments and test results. Encourage your student to have separate, labeled
notebooks for each class.
- Assignments. Suggest writing down assignments for all
classes in one designated place. Include due dates and important
information for each one. Encourage your student to ask the teacher to
explain unclear assignments and keep records of the grades received.
Notice the types of assignments that need more work and make sure your
student asks teachers for help.
Real learning takes time and attention. Reinforce
a consistent approach to learning by creating a specific place and routine
time for studying. Don't forget to allow for breaks!
- Set a Place. Choose a place that is quiet with few
distractions and that has pens, pencils, paper, a dictionary and a ruler
at hand. Study space should be well lighted and have music if it helps
your child concentrate.
- Set a Time. Designate study time when your child is
alert, fresh and relaxed and, ideally, at the same time daily. Don't
forget short breaks to refresh the mind and schedule the first one
before studying begins. During the break, suggest a walk outdoors or
deep breathing exercises. Research studies show that physical well-being
promotes mental well-being and renewed energy.
Time Management: Organizing the work, setting priorities and making choices.
Time Management
Help Your Student Manage Time
Managing time is one of the most important and
useful skills you can help your child learn. Dividing the semester, week and
day into manageable sections helps your student track assignments, deadlines
and activities.
Develop a Time Schedule
A time schedule helps your student worry less
about deadlines and see the big picture in terms of goals, commitments and
time.
Make a master
schedule with your child for the semester
1.
List the
following items:
o all required school activities
o after-school activities
o study times
o family obligations
o blank spaces for activities not yet scheduled
2.
Write
down deadlines for major projects on a blank calendar.
3.
Review
each project to estimate how long it will take to complete. Add a bit more
time, then enter project start dates on the calendar.
Make a weekly
schedule.
1.
Make a
short list of major events, activities and assignments each week. Refer to
the master schedule.
2.
Note
important deadlines.
Make a daily
schedule.
1.
Suggest
and review a "to do" list every day.
2.
Check off
items as they are completed.
3.
Note any
tasks that were not completed and help your student find ways to finish them.
Review the schedule.
After a few weeks, get feedback from your student
on how well the schedule is working. Ask the following questions:
1.
Are you
getting your schoolwork finished on time?
2.
Are you
getting more done?
3.
Do you
feel you are in control of your time?
4.
Do you
have enough time to socialize and relax?
If the answers are "yes", then the
schedule is helping your student to manage time. If there are problems,
review the schedule and see how it can be improved.
Description: 
Thoughts Lead to Actions
Actions Lead to Habits
Habits Lead to Character
Character Leads to a way of life
The Good Habits For Kids Program gives you the knowledge to put thoughts into your children's minds. When your children realize the benefits of Good Actions they start actually doing these actions. Once your children start routinely doing these good actions they develop habits. After these habits have become firm in your children they develop character. When character has developed, the children will have a way of life that only their parents could have given them.
This simple program is easy to understand, implement, and generates
immediate results. Promotes and develops lifetime skills for better kids,
better adults, and better parents.
Makes Children
Accountable.
This program makes
children accountable for their time, duties and responsibilities, encouraging
good behavior, while modifying bad or unwanted behavior. Rewards children for
their effort and motivates children to do better. Most parents are pleasantly
surprised with their children's ability to think of new ways on their own to
succeed on the program.
Extremley Flexible
This program is extremely
flexible and can be tailored to each child's age, ability, maturity and
specific behaviors targeted to modify. As good behaviors are modified and
reinforced they become habits, These habits form a foundation for additional
good behaviors to be modified into good habits for a lifetime.
Immediate Measurable Results
The power of this program
is to provide immediate measurable results, rewarding good behaviors and
forming lifelong habits, promoting Good habits for kids, who become greater
adults and ultimately even better parents of their kids.
Puts you in Control
As human beings, children
naturally want to control their lives and the way they do this when they live
at home is to control their parents. This program puts the parents in control
of the kids and the kids in control of themselves, leading to adults who can
control their own lives.
Works on a Daily Basis
This program uses all of
the principles and elements of your parenting methods and combines them into
one system that is flexible and works on a daily basis for any activity
anywhere. Works with any size family in any circumstance.
Most parents basic goals
in raising children aged 3-14 are simple:
·
Motivated, positive attitude and respect.
·
Initiative, right choices
·
Responsible
·
Honest and trustworthy
·
Good teamwork , social skills and manners
Specifically, many
parents struggle daily with children's personal responsibilities such as:
·
brushing teeth
·
picking up after themselves
·
making their beds
·
practicing music
·
homework
·
etc
Daily household duties
like:
·
Laundry
·
Trash
·
Preparing meals
·
Feeding pets
·
Vacuuming house
·
Cleaning
·
etc.
To encourage good behaviors or discourage bad behaviors most parents have
tried:
·
Yelling
·
Nagging
·
Bribery
·
Paddling
·
Time-out
·
Grounding
·
Denial of privileges
And there are many others but all of them either leave you exhausted, feeling
angry, guilty and frustrated. They are hard to maintain and remain consistent
no matter how hard you try. Children see the inconsistencies of the parents but
do not connect it to their behavior.
It Works!
Why does this program
work while others only work a little while is because children usually figure
out a way around your system. With this system it is easier and less time
consuming than other systems because there isn't a way around it.
You Won't want to quit
Since the administration
of this program is exclusively controlled by the parent, it is critical that
the parent remain committed to the program. Your child knows you very well, and
a popular technique to getting things back to normal is for you to abandon the
program. We are confident that you will be so encouraged by the results that
you will not want to quit.
·
The number #1 problem Orthodontists encounter is motivating children to
wear headgear, rubber bands and brush aggressively.
·
The #1 problem for music teachers is encouraging practice for better
performance.
The Good habits for Kids
program administered by a parent will improve these areas saving money, time,
and better results, the parent ensures success with the program.
Save Time
More family fun time and
activities. Parents save an enormous amount of time not doing what children
should be doing for themselves. Arguing or whining? Big time wasters and pretty
much a thing of the past when the techniques of this program are applied.
Reinforce
Good Habits
The Good Habits for Kids
program was developed to allow families to communicate the necessity of chores
and duties and to reinforce good habits in a consistent non-violent, non
threatening way.
·
Has real rewards and consequences.
·
Promotes independent thinking, personal responsibility and personal
growth.
·
Generates more free time for families by eliminating redundant
ineffective training, and shifts the burden of household chores to the people
creating most of them.
·
It's a game that is fun to administer, has measurable results, is a
consistent and ongoing program and gives kids and parents what they want.
·
It doesn't conflict with the desire to allow children freedom and
responsibility, and allow choices as children grow.
Everyone Wins!
When kids take on more
personal responsibility and Parents have more time to devote to the more
rewarding aspects of parenting. Parents are happier without an unpleasant
atmosphere of nagging, griping and frustration.
Five Good Habits to
Instill In Your Children
A Suze
Orman exclusive
Let’s
talk about how you can raise confident and happy children who possess a healthy
approach to money.
1. ATM ABCs…
If you could get inside the heads of toddlers or young children today, their original understanding of money might be as the prize in a kind of game involving ATMs. Whenever you find a machine, you put your magic card in the slot, punch in a few numbers and voila! money pops out. Cool!
If you could get inside the heads of toddlers or young children today, their original understanding of money might be as the prize in a kind of game involving ATMs. Whenever you find a machine, you put your magic card in the slot, punch in a few numbers and voila! money pops out. Cool!
Quite
innocently, parents are totally messing with their kids by exposing them to
this “game” without providing any context. It seems to me that when a child
reaches four or five years old you have to start explaining how the game really
works. A full-blown lesson on the American banking system isn’t necessary, just
a few brief, clear messages explaining why you’re able to make ATMs “give” you
money on command. Likewise, the next time your child asks why you have to go to
work, I want you to respond along these lines: “I am fortunate because I get to
go do interesting work and earn money, so we will be able to buy things that we
need.” That answer not only begins to introduce the idea that money is earned,
not a part of a game, but it also puts money in a positive light. It drives me
crazy when I hear parents tell their kids: “I hate having to go to work instead
of staying home with you, but I have to go make money.” With that answer you
have managed to teach your kids to hate work and to hate money. Not what you
really intended, right?
2. Shop Talk
A great many of you need to instill some mall
discipline in your kids. The key to this is to set parameters for each trip,
organized around a pre-determined reason or objective for the excursion. Taking
children to the mall without this kind of planned focus is a ticket for
disastrous impulse buying. And just think what message that sends to your
child. Whenever they want something all they have to do is go to the mall and
Mom or Dad will whip out the credit card. How do you expect your child to ever
learn the value of money when you spend it like that?
One
of the best ways to teach moderation and the difference between wanting and
needing is to sit down with your child before you go clothes shopping for the
new school year. Before you ever set foot in the mall, have a clear game plan:
we are looking for three sweaters, four shirts, and four pairs of pants.
Period. And if your kid has a few favorite stores, I suggest you insist they
case each store before any purchase is made. That way, you’ll avoid buying
everything you need at the first store and then having your kid walk into the
next store and claim they will “just die” if they can’t also have this or that
item. The idea is for them to take a look at everything that’s available and
then make choices based on the parameters you’ve set with them.
In
today’s brave new world, of course, you also need to come up with an online
shopping strategy. Because of the incredible convenience, I see way too many
parents buying for their kids via their PC or Mac without thinking. You’re
sitting at dinner and your son mentions a new video game he wants. Then an hour
later, when you are at your computer finishing up on some work, he appears at
your elbow and suggests you just buy it online. So you do.
Take
a look at your credit card statement and add up how many purchases are those
“easy” online transactions made simply because your child asked at an opportune
moment. Scary, huh? It’s time to set some limits. As I explain below, gifts are
to be reserved for truly special occasions. Anything beyond those special
occasions needs to be financed by your child. Part-time jobs (for teens) are
crucial money management lessons for kids.
3. Bill of Rights
In addition to setting the right spending examples with your kids, you also need to teach them the mechanics of managing money. Let them begin to learn by “helping out” when you pay your bills. When a child is a pre-teen or young teen, let him or her even write out a few bill checks for you to sign (or handle the clicks on your online bill-pay). Again, there doesn’t need to be a lecture here, nor is your goal to make your child feel the weight of all your financial responsibilities. But it’s a good first step in showing them what it takes to live. Trust me, a child who receives $5 or $10 for allowance is going to get quite an eye-opener when they see that the gas & electric bill was $300 during the winter months, that the cable is another $40 or so every month, and that your cell phone (one of life’s most basic necessities in their worldview) costs $50 a month.
In addition to setting the right spending examples with your kids, you also need to teach them the mechanics of managing money. Let them begin to learn by “helping out” when you pay your bills. When a child is a pre-teen or young teen, let him or her even write out a few bill checks for you to sign (or handle the clicks on your online bill-pay). Again, there doesn’t need to be a lecture here, nor is your goal to make your child feel the weight of all your financial responsibilities. But it’s a good first step in showing them what it takes to live. Trust me, a child who receives $5 or $10 for allowance is going to get quite an eye-opener when they see that the gas & electric bill was $300 during the winter months, that the cable is another $40 or so every month, and that your cell phone (one of life’s most basic necessities in their worldview) costs $50 a month.
Speaking
of cell phones, when you decide to give your child one, don’t pass up the
opportunity for a great financial lesson. Even if you are simply adding a child
to an existing plan, let them know what their “share” of the bill is. I would
recommend that you increase their chores and responsibilities around the house
to offset the cost of their phone. Again, you are not denying them; you are
taking advantage of a natural way to teach them that nothing is free. And any
excess minutes they run up need to come out of their own allowance, or be
worked off with extra jobs around the house.
4. Gifts Are Not a Given
I don’t care how wealthy you may be, or how much joy you get showering your kids with toys and gifts. You have got to show some restraint. It’s good for them, and for you too.
I don’t care how wealthy you may be, or how much joy you get showering your kids with toys and gifts. You have got to show some restraint. It’s good for them, and for you too.
Gifts
should be for an occasion. A birthday. A holiday. An important milestone. If
you simply buy everything your children wants, you are not only taking away the
“specialness” of gifts, you are setting up your kid to be a financial wreck.
The children who get everything they want at 12 become the 22-year-olds with
huge credit card balances they can’t pay—simply because they grew up not
understanding moderation and living within one’s means.
Don’t
feel guilty about scaling back the spending. It’s not about saying, “No, you
can’t have that pair of jeans.” It’s all about saying, “Why don’t you put them
on your list for Christmas, or for your birthday?” And hey, if they absolutely
must have something N-O-W, please let them “earn” it with a job or project
around the house.
5. Give’em Credit
You must educate your kids about how credit cards work before they go to college. That way they won’t fall prey to all the credit card offers they will be assaulted with during freshman orientation. I can’t tell you how many thousands of young adults tell me their money problems began in school: they fell for the card offers and started charging away without understanding the ramifications of what they were doing.
You must educate your kids about how credit cards work before they go to college. That way they won’t fall prey to all the credit card offers they will be assaulted with during freshman orientation. I can’t tell you how many thousands of young adults tell me their money problems began in school: they fell for the card offers and started charging away without understanding the ramifications of what they were doing.
That’s
where you come in. Make them card savvy when they are young and you will
literally save them thousands of dollars in interest payments that they’ll know
how to avoid.
You
have a few options in how to give your kid credit. If you have a good FICO
score of at least 720, I recommend that while you child is young you simply add
their name to all of your credit cards as an authorized user. Obviously you are
not to give them your credit cards, or in most cases even let them know you
have done this. But by doing so, your good FICO score will become theirs as
well. Then when your child hits 13 or so, I think it is time to give them a
debit card tied to an account you set up for them. Each month you deposit a set
sum in the account and discuss with your child what expenses are to be covered
under it. And because they can only charge up to the amount in the account, they
are going to learn a lot about money management the first time they try to use
the card at the mall and it is turned down. (A crucial tip, though: make sure
the account at the bank is set up so they will not be covered by a bank
overdraft policy; you want them to simply be turned down if they try to charge
beyond their balance.)
I
would also encourage you to encourage them to stick with a debit card while in
college. Yes, I know this doesn’t help them build a FICO score, but if they are
on your cards as an authorized user, they’re already doing that. And for
heaven’s sake please do everything you can to steer your kid away from jumping
at the credit card offers they will be enticed with during college. As I said,
thousands of young adults have told me this was how their financial life took a
really bad turn right out of the gate. They just charged away in school, and
then when they hit the real world they had a ton of debt and a lousy FICO
score. It’s better if they wait until they are out of school to get their own
card. With an income and the solid FICO score they’ve accrued from your credit
cards, they should be able to get a good deal then—and be mature enough to use
it wisely.
Once
again though, remember that your child’s financial future largely depends on
your financial reality today. You can’t teach them what they need to know if
you yourself are financially irresponsible. I know you may be 20 or 30 or 40
years older than your children, but that doesn’t mean you are any more mature
than they are if you have no respect for money. If that’s the case, you need to
grow up fast before you ruin your chances of raising a financially secure
child.
